My mission, should I choose to accept it...

It’s a running joke amongst my friends that when it comes to films, I am utterly clueless.

“Have you seen...oh, wait, it’s you, of course you haven’t,” is a common conversation starter. People sit in pubs and quote films at each other and I decide it’s probably a good time to make a lengthy trip to the bar.

With the possible exception of football, cinema is the great leveller. I’m not completely culturally ignorant, I’ve just never got round to watching The Godfather or E.T. or Casablanca or any of those other films people always mention with the prefix, “oh, but you must have seen...” - to which the answer is invariably no. (Despite all this, I used to be a film critic on my university newspaper, which I like to see as a shining testament of my blagging skills).

So, to cut a long story short, I have decided to rectify this. Chiefly by watching a lot of DVDs. I am armed with a LOVEFiLM account, a list of the supposed hundred greatest films, and several bottles of red wine.

This blog is essentially a way for me to express my opinions on the films I see, quite possibly be shouted at for being ‘wrong’, and for people to laugh at my supreme ignorance.

After spending many hours on Google boggling at the number of ‘great’ films I have never seen (and some I’ve never even heard of), I settled for The Times' list.

Firstly, for some reason it’s available online despite the fact I haven’t signed up as a subscriber. This makes me feel as if I am getting some sort of value for money.

Secondly, it was the only list I found that had one of my favourite films in the top ten, suggesting that I and whoever compiled it have reasonably similar tastes.

Thirdly, and perhaps most importantly, The Shawshank Redemption is nowhere to be seen. I saw this for the first time last year, and was spectacularly underwhelmed. After being told repeatedly that it was OMG THE BEST FILM EVAH, I found predictable, saccharine and (quelle horreur) a bit boring.

Fourthly, it has a decent number of foreign-language films on it. Hollywood isn’t the be all and end all.

And, finally, Jurassic Park is at number 100. As my original plan was to start at the end and work my way up to the elusive number one, I decided that any mission that started with dinosaurs (particularly a T Rex eating a man having a poo), had to be worth pursuing. Sadly, my fate is now in the hands of LOVEFiLM. The entire 100 list is now sitting in my rentals request, and I await their decision. Wish me luck.